It’s back to school time, a time of excitement and a time of anticipation. For gifted kids, it’s also a time of anxiety and even foreboding as they see another year of frustration, bullying/intimidation, embarrassment, and more problems with peers, teachers, and parents.
Your child is gifted. You want him or her to love learning and to look forward to developing the talents that you know are there. You want to have your child prepared for the possible boredom of the classroom, misunderstanding of teachers, and indifference or animosity from other students. Most schools, quite frankly, do not have standards high enough to nourish gifted students properly.
If your school administration, teachers, and philosophy support giftedness in their student population, then you want your child ready for the possible acceleration and enrichment activities ahead.
As school approaches, what should you be aware of and what can you do to make sure your gifted child will be ready on day one for the new school year?
Discussing the Upcoming New School Year
Gifted children are different from those in the normal population. Your children know that and are uncomfortable when having to work with children less gifted. Talk to your gifted children and explain that it is OK to not fit in. Everyone is different and unique. Remind them that they always fit in at home. They have weaknesses like everyone else, but they also have unique strengths that others do not have.
Reinforce positive messages with your children and boost their self-image and confidence. Some parents put positive notes or surprise treats in lunch bags or lunch boxes to add a smile and extra dash of love in the early weeks of school.
Discuss any problems that may have occurred last year and how your children responded to those problems, good or bad, and talk about how to handle them should they come up again. Remind them that they can and should bring any problems to you for advice and support. You can help them, maybe by talking to teachers or counselors, and you should be ready to do that without embarrassing your children or putting any additional stress on them.
Smoothing the Path Through Advocacy
You can make it easier for your children to start school if you go in and speak with their teachers as early as possible before or during the start of school. Make sure teachers and counselors know about any learning disabilities as well as particular strengths and interests.
Educate school staff on issues like dyslexia, ADHD, anxiety, or any other disorder that is affecting your child and the possible manifestations of each. Try to explain how your children may be misunderstood in how they respond to certain situations. Giftedness itself is reason enough to act differently in the classroom. Those children who are twice exceptional have even more reason to have professionals around them who fully understand their needs and can provide the interventions that will support them. Make sure those interventions are there, whether that is having a scribe to write for them or a tutor to spend extra time with them, or an in-class aide to work with them, or some other service.
Fostering the Value of Being Organized
The beginning of the school year can be chaotic for your gifted children. There will probably be new teachers, new classmates, maybe even a new school and community.There may be new procedures for registering, getting class assignments, acquiring books and resources, meeting teachers, and more. It can be very intimidating.
For children with a learning disability, organization may be totally foreign. You can help them by creating a special place at home that is clutter-free for doing homework. You can designate a particular place in the home for studying, for storing books and school supplies, for writing, etc.
Some parents set aside the kitchen or dining room table so the parents can keep an eye on their children, their study routines, and any problems that interfere with their study. They are also close by to provide support and answer questions. This is often more advantageous than having the children work alone in their bedrooms or some room set aside for study where frustrations will not be so apparent.
Some parents set aside cupboard space or drawer space for pencils, erasers, markers, paper, sharpeners, and other items that can be shared by their children. And the children are taught to put everything away after using them so they are ready for the next homework session.
Establishing a Well-Rounded School Routine
School requires a certain routine that can be very demanding of children with learning disabilities. It can be a challenge for any gifted student who may be distracted or focused on something else or having to deal with peer problems – any number of issues can interfere with your children’s abilities to regulate their own internal clocks to respond to the daily regimen of school demands.
Establishing regular routines at home can help. In the weeks leading up to the start of school, have your children get up at the same time they would during the school year. Have them make lunches and go outside the same time they would be boarding the school bus.
Make a checklist of what has to be done after school and before going to bed. What should be done the following morning? Make decisions ahead of time for what clothes will be worn and what will be in the lunches, what homework is due, and any other school requirements for that day.
There may be summer reading the school has asked for and you can work with your children on that project. Even without the requirement, doing some reading in the weeks before school starts will get your children acclimated to the practice.
There are other things you can do to stimulate your children’s thinking in ways that get them ready for school. Take them shopping and have them discuss prices and sales and give their opinions on bargains. Practice open-ended questions, encourage their evaluations, and have them give you examples of good values. These activities support higher-order thinking.
Creating a routine of familiar activities will reduce the anxiety of running into them for the first time in a school year where everything is new and suddenly demanding. You can do a lot more than you think to get your gifted children ready to enter the new school year with confidence and healthy anticipation rather than fear and anxiety.
